[18 Apr 12] I kissed a girl and I liked it

[NobodySpecial]

I just....in the first place, it's a terrible song, and you don't make good points with terrible songs. Might as well play some T.A.T.U. if we're going for the fake lesbian vibe.

[Zanosuke Kurosaki]

(Thank you for sticking to "mild inconvenience". It gets me down when anyone wishes serious harm on anyone. But sometimes I do wish a bucket of cold water on some people. ;p)

Yeah, I... for all my fascination with weapons, strategy and tactics*, I just can't bring myself to actively wish real harm on people. Especially not for just some pop song, because then otherwise my list would be a lot longer than it already is (however, nothing is ever convincing me to remove Creed from said list.) Except maybe monsters (y'know, genocidal types, types that protest at funerals with signs that make the red veil drop so fast it's amazing you're not hitting them with those signs, whoever came up with Kids Bop...) that shouldn't walk under the living sky. And even then, I only feel they should be removed from this mortal coil after due process has taken place.

*Not like the video games I play or the action figures I have, nor the G.I. Joe tabletop** home-brew roleplaying system I'm slowly developing would point in this direction, nope. XD
**Using the figures and vehicles as the "miniatures", to boot. First rule I realized I would need: "I don't care what version of Snake-Eyes you have, players aren't using Ninjas. Those are GM-only!"

[Freemage]

I just....in the first place, it's a terrible song, and you don't make good points with terrible songs. Might as well play some T.A.T.U. if we're going for the fake lesbian vibe.

Well, the question then becomes, is this an effort to make a point, or is this an effort to piss someone off? If the latter, I'd say the song-player... chose wisely.

[brasca]

I just....in the first place, it's a terrible song, and you don't make good points with terrible songs. Might as well play some T.A.T.U. if we're going for the fake lesbian vibe.

I think TATU counts as Eurosexuals.

And please don't flame me it's just a joke Leah.

[bunnies]

Sexual identity is not something to be taken so lightly the way the song is doing, argle-bargle *commence foaming and being dragged away by lab-coat types*

Why not, exactly?

I take my sexual identity very lightly. I've kissed a girl more than once. I don't consider myself "bisexual" or "queer" or anything, but when I was younger...I was a young girl, who enjoyed having fun with my sexuality. I didn't want a label or a "sexual identity" or to become an activist. I wanted to enjoy my own life. My sexuality is something personal and I can take it as lightly as I want.

If a girl kisses another girl to attract a guy who is watching, who the fuck are you to criticize what turns her on? Would you be okay with it if she were a "bi-curious woman with an slight exhibition fetish who gets turned on by men with latent voyeur tendencies" or something all serious sounding?

I don't really like that song, because it's pretty bland sounding, but I really get annoyed when people freak out about it. I know plenty of girls who have kissed friends, kind of annoying to hear a lecture about how we're doing it wrong.

[Captain LeBubbles]

Now that's what I call making an entrance.

[bunnies]

ha.

I've had this argument before about this song. It's a stupid song. But people react to it so negatively because it doesn't fit into their little boxes.

[NobodySpecial]

If a girl kisses another girl to attract a guy who is watching, who the fuck are you to criticize what turns her on?

I think you just answered the question for a lot of folks, especially if (for example) the criticizer was a gay man who'd been repeatedly beaten by family members and ejected from the family at a young age. Sexuality is personal, but not everyone gets to go around breaking the boxes with complete immunity.

[bunnies]

If a girl kisses another girl to attract a guy who is watching, who the fuck are you to criticize what turns her on?

I think you just answered the question for a lot of folks, especially if (for example) the criticizer was a gay man who'd been repeatedly beaten by family members and ejected from the family at a young age. Sexuality is personal, but not everyone gets to go around breaking the boxes with complete immunity.

So the solution to being attacked for your own sexuality is to attack others for theirs?

Don't get me wrong I'm not comparing homophobic violence to snark on message boards, but if someone can say honestly "I like kissing girls because it turns me on to know that guys think I'm hot when I do it" then why hate? It's one thing to work against prejudice, but I see no need to criticize people who are just doing their own thing.

Oh and to clarify when I kissed my friends it was because I had fun doing it, the one time there was a guy there it was actually really fucking awkward. But I don't have a problem with the idea of people doing what they want sexually, with consenting partners, etc.

[Brook]

If a girl kisses another girl to attract a guy who is watching, who the fuck are you to criticize what turns her on?

Crucial point: does the girl she is kissing know about her reasons?

If yes: to each their own. Nobody has a right to judge someone else's thrill, only how they treat others when getting it.

If no: it hurts badly to believe someone is interested in you, and find out they were just using you to get someone else's attention. No matter the details.

EDIT: missed a reply there...

(Thank you for sticking to "mild inconvenience". It gets me down when anyone wishes serious harm on anyone. But sometimes I do wish a bucket of cold water on some people. ;p)

Yeah, I... for all my fascination with weapons, strategy and tactics*, I just can't bring myself to actively wish real harm on people. Especially not for just some pop song, because then otherwise my list would be a lot longer than it already is (however, nothing is ever convincing me to remove Creed from said list.) Except maybe monsters (y'know, genocidal types, types that protest at funerals with signs that make the red veil drop so fast it's amazing you're not hitting them with those signs, whoever came up with Kids Bop...) that shouldn't walk under the living sky. And even then, I only feel they should be removed from this mortal coil after due process has taken place.

Toys of all kinds are so much fun. Ahem. Same here. I have my own fascination with themes of life and death, some of it quite violent, but as regards real life actions I really don't want anyone to get hurt. Not even the "real bad guys" - I just want them to be prevented from hurting anyone else.
/EDIT

[oddtail]

If a girl kisses another girl to attract a guy who is watching, who the fuck are you to criticize what turns her on?

Crucial point: does the girl she is kissing know about her reasons?

If yes: to each their own. Nobody has a right to judge someone else's thrill, only how they treat others when getting it.

If no: it hurts badly to believe someone is interested in you, and find out they were just using you to get someone else's attention. No matter the details.

This, very much this. Who you kiss and for what reasons is irrelevant ONLY when the person you kiss (or otherwise interact with) is not objectified by you. Nobody deserves to be the tool for the fulfillment of someone else's goals. A kiss in our culture is a show of intimacy, and unless clearly indicated otherwise (verbally or not), it implies interest. If there's no interest involved, it is dishonest and potentially hurtful.

There are no rules about what should turn you on or not, but there is one important rule - don't hurt and exploit people.

[bunnies]

I agree. Sometimes though kissing is just fun and there's nothing else to it.

[Louisa]

I think another reason people dislike the song is that it feeds into the cultural belief that all women who kiss women are doing it only for male attention/ as some kind of "experiment". And it's kind of annoying to have people assume that as your motivation. But the answer to that problem isn't to get rid of all material that represents these motivations for kissing your own gender; it's to produce more material in which women kiss each other for other reasons.

[Lia S]

I think another reason people dislike the song is that it feeds into the cultural belief that all women who kiss women are doing it only for male attention/ as some kind of "experiment". And it's kind of annoying to have people assume that as your motivation. But the answer to that problem isn't to get rid of all material that represents these motivations for kissing your own gender; it's to produce more material in which women kiss each other for other reasons.

Maybe producing enough such material isn't the problem, but getting it published in mainstream media is. I hope I'm wrong but it seems that a song about a girl kissing a girl still only gets mainstream attention when this behavior is considered naughty and she actually/also likes men.

[Louisa]

Good point, Lia, I'd overlooked that. I'd like to amend my statement to "the solution is having more mainstream representations of women kissing each other for reasons that don't involve men and/or aren't merely an 'experiment'". As to how to get more mainstream representations... I'm not sure, sadly. But you're right that ease of publishing is certainly one of the factors currently at play.